Mother’s Perspective on Moving Interstate

Making the decision to settle in a different state can be an exciting time but also filled with doubt, wondering and second guessing whether you are making the right decision for you and your family. There are many reasons why families choose to settle in a different state, the goals and desires of the family may have changed, it could be a job opportunity interstate, moving to be closer to family and friends, a much needed sea change or economic reasons such as housing affordability that makes sense to explore.

Moving is never an easy task and the whole experience can be compared to the stresses of renovating a home, there will be a lot of worry and anxiety to overcome before there is pure bliss. So let’s have a look at how relocating the family can be simplified from a mother’s perspective.

Getting to your new home

Have you ever been on a road trip with 3 young children? Imagine hubby insisting on a summer’s holiday from Melbourne to Brisbane, driving interstate through two state borders all confined to an uncomfortable area for 18 hours, it is not fun at all. So when hubby insists on driving the family car to your new home with as much furniture crammed in as possible, politely disagree. Not only is this adding more stress to an already stressful situation, it negatively draws away the excitement as a family unit during this special time. To create more harmony, try to make decisions as a family and compromise. Taking a short interstate flight may not be the cheapest option to relocate the whole family, however you may be able to find cheap interstate vehicle transport options to balance it out.

Plan and execute

Leaving your relocation to the last minute will not help you in any way. Instead, have a plan in place and knowing how to execute it will serve you well. Time is a valuable resource and we always need more of it, one advantage that mothers have is that we know how to multitask and have great time management skills. Once you know when your moving date is, start planning at least 8 weeks out, begin with moving week and plan backwards. The internet is a wonderful resource and you can usually find moving checklists readily available.

Organizing systematically

No doubt mothers tend to accumulate plenty of items over the years, most of them priceless and some not so. Take the opportunity to clear out what you don’t need. Instead of paying for useless possessions to be moved to your new place, why not throw it out to free up some precious real estate on the moving truck? Try packing items systematically; labelling boxes with the room it belongs to so removalists can move it to the correct room upon delivery, thus reducing a step and saving your precious back when it comes time to unpack.

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Get Your Kids to Listen

Have you ever listened to yourself in the morning? If the kids are not fighting, they are crying about something so trivial. When you ask them to do something, it normally needs to be repeated and each time you say it, your tone gets louder and before you know it, you are screaming and yelling. It seems like the only way to go before they take action, that’s not the kind of mum I wanted to be!

At a workshop I asked parents to share their problems and the most common problem that came up time and time again was that the kids don’t listen!  So let’s try and look at this in detail and see how we can overcome this problem to be the mum you always wanted to be.

Talk less

A study has shown that we are constantly correcting our children on a daily basis, for example we ask them to ‘get changed’, ‘wash your hands’. Did you know that they are capable of absorbing approximately 50 instructions per day? We need to cut them some slack, talk less and give instructions wisely.

Let them make their own mistakes

Ever made empty threats and not delivering? We all have. Sometimes we need to take a step back and let them make their own mistakes. If there toys are still lying around after telling them to pack it away multiple times, confiscate it for a period. If they haven’t placed their lunch box in the sink after school, let them face a smelly school bag tomorrow.

Demonstrate Good Listening

We aren’t great listeners at the best of times, so demonstrate active listening skills to your children as children learn by observing. Active listening involves eye contact, undivided attention and responding to what is being said. You’re not really demonstrating active listening when you are looking at the phone or busy with something else.

Show them love

Kids always want to make you proud, they are always showing you a new trick they learnt or demonstrating something new. Show them your care and be excited for them, no matter how big or small an achievement, emphasize your love and you’ll be surprised what you’ll get in return.

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